Friday, March 8, 2013

Sometimes, I Pat The Wrong Person On The Back.

I grabbed coffee with one of my dearest friends yesterday. I always look forward to those mornings. We have a tendency to catch up on weeks' worth of happenings in the span of 2-3 hours. We also have the tendency to spend time talking about how we balance life; a small business, a husband, a home that needs taking care of, and a social life, just to name a few.

These are not philosophical conversations by any means, but they do always leave me thinking. About my priorities and the things that I allow to fill up my life. 

Just yesterday, I mentioned that I think I have begun to 'worship' busyness. What is it about keeping busy that makes us feel validated? And for some reason, I feel like women do this more than men. 

I am constantly running in circles trying my hardest to accomplish everything on my to-do list. A to-do list that I spend time putting together each week, and then updating several more times. Of course, there are things on the list that need to get done, otherwise my business would fail. But, there is something inside of me that thrives off of a full to-do list. It's like once I finish a productive day, and cross off more than that day's fair share of items, I sit on my couch coming up with several other items to take their place.

Do I think that being constantly busy makes me more important? Or perhaps it is just me trying to have more control. I am an admitted Type-A personality, and maintaining a sense of control comforts me. But, I can't do it all by myself, and I am not responsible for all that has been given to me either.

I often forget to thank God for all He has given me. To stop patting myself on the back for a 'job well done' when the credit and praise should really be His.

I don't want to keep glorifying busyness. After all, a full calendar and an endless to-do list doesn't make me a better person. It's not the stuff that life is really made of. I want to enjoy my down time and not spend it feeling guilty for what I'm not accomplishing.

This is an on-going struggle for me. But I want to hold myself accountable, and drawing support from other women will help me to do just that. 

Here's to patting the 'right' person on the back. And to not measuring your worth by the number of check marks or slashes you scribble each week.


Lauran {The Real Young Housewife of Southern VA} said...

Amen sista!!! I believe, for you, once the baby comes along you'll learn to let go of the "to-do" lists and focus on the baby and family time! There is nothing wrong with being busy as long as it's not interfering with your normal life with you husband, family, and friends. And as you said, thanking the right person is key. God is allowing you to be busy and accompilsh those tasks, but we always need to be mindful that he can take it all away from us just as quickly as he gave it to us! :) Good for you for regrouping yourself and priorities!!

Anna @ The Things I'm Learning said...

This is an awesome post! I wrote something similar a while back. I think our society places so much emphasis on being busy that we just fly from event to event and task to task and forget to just live and enjoy. It's something I, as a fellow Type A, struggle with and I'm trying to improve.

LWLH said...

You hit the nail on the head with this one. I think so many women are guilty of this.

Stephanie said...

So, I thought this post was going to be something different- about literally patting the wrong person on the back- to which I was going to say that once time I saw who I THOUGHT was my Sister In Law in Target so I walked and and smacked her on the butt and it wasn't her... I. died.

BUT since it wasn't about that, I love it just the same- it's a great reminder that sometimes God just wants us to be still. Resting in His presence can be a great form of worship!

New follower :)

Ashley Paige said...

Have you heard of the ministry book Beyond Busy? The author, I believe, started a Lenten pledge #NotBusy that was geared to switch one's focus from glorifying busy to glorifying Him. I just saw something about the glorification of busy on Pinterest the other day. It's a chalkboard graphic that says "Stop the glorifcation of busy." I think, like you said, its something we women take on ourselves. Maybe it makes us feel more validated? Productive? More contributing members of society/our household? Although I will say- when I was working full time? I never felt "busy" like I do now.. managing my responsibilities at home with a job/hobby that I've chosen (keyword) to add to my plate.. It's not my family responsibilities that overwhelm me.. it's all the "extra" I take on.. So interesting. Great points!

Erin said...

Great post! I too, thought this was going to be about something else, but I love what it's about. It's so easy to get caught up in all the "busy work" and to forget to take time to thank the one who has allowed us the "busy work." It's also important to take time to rest.

So glad I found you on IG, I really enjoy your posts!

Jennifer said...

This is definitely my favorite post of the week, or maybe month! I feel the same way you do.

I've been trying to plan a dinner date with another family and I felt like myself and my mom friend were going back and forth on dates because we are both so busy. But I felt like it almost turned into a competition of who was busier. It was annoying! She said I would understand how busy life gets when I have a kid in school but I already feel busy being a working mom and having a crazy toddler. How dare she say that she is busier than me! :P

But then I realized that I don't want to be that busy. It takes away from quality family time!

Hilary said...

I don't know what to do with myself if I'm not busy! I usually find myself wasting time until my tasks build up so much that I'm scrambling again.